Colorado State University has warned faculty that terms such as ‘straight’, ‘male’ and ‘America’ are non inclusive and should be avoided.

The previously respected University has instructed faculty members against using the words ‘straight’ and ‘male’ lest they cause offence. The University of Colorado State has created an ‘inclusive language guide’ which gives staff alternative words for the “toxic” terms.

The university has instructed staff that the word ‘straight’ implies anyone from the LGBT persuasion was ‘crooked’ or not normal, with the authorities suggesting ‘heterosexual’ as a suitable alternative. In a very random addition, saying ‘spirit animal’, is now classed as potential cultural appropriation and likely to offend Native Americans.

The Guide introduces itself stating the following: “The guide is not about political correctness or policing grammar, but rather helping communicators practice inclusive language and helping everyone on our campus feel welcomed, respected, and valued.”

While warning of the dangerous use of terms like ‘male’ and ‘female’ because of apparently outdated definitions like biological sex, it makes the recommendation to adopt ‘gender non-binary/gender non-conforming’ phraseology. Furthermore, ‘he’ and ‘she’ are also dangerous terms as they suggest that there are only two genders so therefore binary thus excluding the wide spectrum of growing gender definitions.

The guide also made the recommendation to ease use of the word ‘America’ in reference to the US, as this doesn’t acknowledge South America.

Twitter was set ablaze (what else?) by these strange demands.

“Colorado State University: avoid using the word “America” because it’s not inclusive – “The guide is not about political-correctness or policing grammar . . . ” – Doublethink. Of course, that is exactly what it is. Our universities use “1984” as a user manual.”

Twitter user on Colorado State Political Correctness Manual